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a headstone for her ashes
Jul. 28th, 2009 12:42 pmSo I get a letter from the cemetery. About the possible headstones we can get, ranging in price from $300-800. Or a brick in the garden by the cemetery office for $75. I understand it's a business, but this? It's...
You'd think I would be past this, right? My father in 2005. My step-father in 2007. My mom a month ago. You'd think I'd be used to this by now.
I don't know, it just seems... I have no words for it. Putting a price on everything related to death is so weird.
When the eye bank called me a couple hours after she died, I said to the guy on the phone, "You are so lucky I'm an ER nurse." Which took him aback. But what I meant was, as an ER nurse, I hate notifying ROBI/Gift of Hope when people die, because I know that they will be contacting family members to ask about organ donation at the worst possible time in these people's lives. And I know most of those people are going to say No, because they're in shock and they're horrified. But, as a nurse, I'm okay with that stuff. I've seen a lot of deaths. And I knew my mom wanted to donate her organs, but she couldn't, because of the chemo. But eye parts they can still use even with chemo -- at least, the corneas, because they're not vascularized, they have no real circulation.
So that was dealable.
But this? Putting a price on everything?
I know it's against code and all, and a public health hazard -- ok, the nurse in me knows all that. But I don't understand why you can't just bury your loved ones where they lived and fuck all this organized capitalism around death. I mean, that's where all our old pets are buried.
But she wanted to be cremated and interred on top of her mom's grave, so that's what we did. And they've found ways to make that just as expensive as a regular funeral and burial. Sons of bitches.
You'd think I would be past this, right? My father in 2005. My step-father in 2007. My mom a month ago. You'd think I'd be used to this by now.
I don't know, it just seems... I have no words for it. Putting a price on everything related to death is so weird.
When the eye bank called me a couple hours after she died, I said to the guy on the phone, "You are so lucky I'm an ER nurse." Which took him aback. But what I meant was, as an ER nurse, I hate notifying ROBI/Gift of Hope when people die, because I know that they will be contacting family members to ask about organ donation at the worst possible time in these people's lives. And I know most of those people are going to say No, because they're in shock and they're horrified. But, as a nurse, I'm okay with that stuff. I've seen a lot of deaths. And I knew my mom wanted to donate her organs, but she couldn't, because of the chemo. But eye parts they can still use even with chemo -- at least, the corneas, because they're not vascularized, they have no real circulation.
So that was dealable.
But this? Putting a price on everything?
I know it's against code and all, and a public health hazard -- ok, the nurse in me knows all that. But I don't understand why you can't just bury your loved ones where they lived and fuck all this organized capitalism around death. I mean, that's where all our old pets are buried.
But she wanted to be cremated and interred on top of her mom's grave, so that's what we did. And they've found ways to make that just as expensive as a regular funeral and burial. Sons of bitches.