interview for ER job; mom's 69th b-day
Aug. 1st, 2007 09:43 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
verushka70I have an interview for a night shift Emergency Dept. Registered Nurse position next Tuesday. I'm excited, if only because it will be $23.98/hour, plus an extra $3/hour for the shift differential. (First, however, I have 3 weeks of orientation on the day shift -- bummer -- at the base pay rate. Not complaining, though! It sure beats the $6.50/hour I'm making NOW. . .)
Well, the psychiatrist looked at my old Rx bottles and decided that I am a credible witness (backed up with un-fakeable evidence), and took pity on me (I guess) and wrote me Rxs for Zanaflex (generic: tizanidine, a muscle relaxant) 4mg 1-2 at bedtime, Topamax (topiramate, an anti-spasticity drug) 25mg 1-2 pills at bedtime, and amitriptyline (that IS the generic name) 25mg 1-2 pills at bedtime. I was taking all of those a few years ago while under active treatment for the myofascial pain syndrome, but then I lost my job, eventually lost my COBRA, and my MPS was under control then mainly because losing my job meant I no longer had the stress of working directly under the supervision of a psycho. However, in the last few months, all that shit has been acting up, especially badly in the last 5 weeks or so, with the same old symptoms: stiff neck, terrible neck & upper back pain, waking 1-3 times a night with the interrupted sleep of a chronic pain syndrome.
All of these drugs are not in high enough doses to interact with the Wellbutrin (450 mg) and buspirone (10 mg 2 x day) I'm already on, but will most likely allow me to have uninterrupted nights of sleep, which should greatly contribute to stabilizing my mental health. Because, like, I was getting very labile and extreeeemely irritable the last few weeks -- liable to fly off the handle over things that I'd normally tolerate with slight grumbling at most. But waking 1-3 times per night & having trouble falling back asleep -- yeah, that'll frazzle you. Especially when it goes on night after night after night.
Now, the only trick is to pay for them all without any insurance yet. A couple are available from Wal-Mart on their $4 generic program. But others are not, dammit. I'll have to put them on a credit card -- which I would normally never do, but at least I know I have the RN job (& more importantly, the pay) to look forward to, to pay the credit card bill. I am lucky to have that in my future. So many people don't.
So, I might actually be semi-normal by the time I interview for this job. Thank god the current job is not very demanding. Despite the heat, it's been pretty slow. Just a trickle of bug bites, my-tummy-hurts (which is usually actually my-best-friend-is-now-best-friends-w/-someone-else-&-I-can't-cope-cuz-I'm-6-yrs-old), I-fell-&-scraped-my-knee/leg, and I'm-here-for-my-scheduled-meds. I have been able to almost finish Patricia Cornwell's book on Jack the Ripper in the past 6 business days. Cheerful reading, it is not. But fascinating.
Time for bed with the cats, after I throw a load of wash in. Sigh.
My mom turned 69 today & we had a gathering at a local restaurant complete with chocolate fondue. Yay. Old friends of hers who were invited turned up -- people she doesn't see often. It feels like everyone is saying to themselves "I better see her now -- there may not be another birthday chance to see her." Even though I think that is probably unlikely. Her cancer, though growing, does seem "indolent" as one doctor described it. I mean, 1.5-2 cm in a year is not that much. Of course, it will get worse. But for now, I think she might have another year or two or three left to live before it becomes miserable I'm-on-oxygen-all-the-time-now.
But, by all means, I understand the carpe diem mentality. Of both my mom & her friends. They are all getting older. And there are so many less of them now than there used to be.
I am realizing as time goes by that I should rent "The Barbarian Invasions" for my mom or at least re-watch it myself to prepare. And even though I know her death is inevitable and that it will be the lung cancer that kills her, I also know that if you have a chance to prepare for your death -- and your loved ones have the chance to prepare -- it is so much better than if you suddenly die and people are left with not only the grief but the sudden shock of it all. We at least will have the opportunity to prepare ourselves for the worst of it. It's not like she'll be suddenly ripped from us in the prime of health.
That's something. Seems like it wouldn't be, but it makes a difference.
Well, the psychiatrist looked at my old Rx bottles and decided that I am a credible witness (backed up with un-fakeable evidence), and took pity on me (I guess) and wrote me Rxs for Zanaflex (generic: tizanidine, a muscle relaxant) 4mg 1-2 at bedtime, Topamax (topiramate, an anti-spasticity drug) 25mg 1-2 pills at bedtime, and amitriptyline (that IS the generic name) 25mg 1-2 pills at bedtime. I was taking all of those a few years ago while under active treatment for the myofascial pain syndrome, but then I lost my job, eventually lost my COBRA, and my MPS was under control then mainly because losing my job meant I no longer had the stress of working directly under the supervision of a psycho. However, in the last few months, all that shit has been acting up, especially badly in the last 5 weeks or so, with the same old symptoms: stiff neck, terrible neck & upper back pain, waking 1-3 times a night with the interrupted sleep of a chronic pain syndrome.
All of these drugs are not in high enough doses to interact with the Wellbutrin (450 mg) and buspirone (10 mg 2 x day) I'm already on, but will most likely allow me to have uninterrupted nights of sleep, which should greatly contribute to stabilizing my mental health. Because, like, I was getting very labile and extreeeemely irritable the last few weeks -- liable to fly off the handle over things that I'd normally tolerate with slight grumbling at most. But waking 1-3 times per night & having trouble falling back asleep -- yeah, that'll frazzle you. Especially when it goes on night after night after night.
Now, the only trick is to pay for them all without any insurance yet. A couple are available from Wal-Mart on their $4 generic program. But others are not, dammit. I'll have to put them on a credit card -- which I would normally never do, but at least I know I have the RN job (& more importantly, the pay) to look forward to, to pay the credit card bill. I am lucky to have that in my future. So many people don't.
So, I might actually be semi-normal by the time I interview for this job. Thank god the current job is not very demanding. Despite the heat, it's been pretty slow. Just a trickle of bug bites, my-tummy-hurts (which is usually actually my-best-friend-is-now-best-friends-w/-someone-else-&-I-can't-cope-cuz-I'm-6-yrs-old), I-fell-&-scraped-my-knee/leg, and I'm-here-for-my-scheduled-meds. I have been able to almost finish Patricia Cornwell's book on Jack the Ripper in the past 6 business days. Cheerful reading, it is not. But fascinating.
Time for bed with the cats, after I throw a load of wash in. Sigh.
My mom turned 69 today & we had a gathering at a local restaurant complete with chocolate fondue. Yay. Old friends of hers who were invited turned up -- people she doesn't see often. It feels like everyone is saying to themselves "I better see her now -- there may not be another birthday chance to see her." Even though I think that is probably unlikely. Her cancer, though growing, does seem "indolent" as one doctor described it. I mean, 1.5-2 cm in a year is not that much. Of course, it will get worse. But for now, I think she might have another year or two or three left to live before it becomes miserable I'm-on-oxygen-all-the-time-now.
But, by all means, I understand the carpe diem mentality. Of both my mom & her friends. They are all getting older. And there are so many less of them now than there used to be.
I am realizing as time goes by that I should rent "The Barbarian Invasions" for my mom or at least re-watch it myself to prepare. And even though I know her death is inevitable and that it will be the lung cancer that kills her, I also know that if you have a chance to prepare for your death -- and your loved ones have the chance to prepare -- it is so much better than if you suddenly die and people are left with not only the grief but the sudden shock of it all. We at least will have the opportunity to prepare ourselves for the worst of it. It's not like she'll be suddenly ripped from us in the prime of health.
That's something. Seems like it wouldn't be, but it makes a difference.